Cool new featuress for a new kde?!

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hey! :) I'm not a programmer, but I'm just wondering...
 
A desktop interface with active, animated and auto-updated desktop scenes (e.g. an ocean scene updated dawn/noon/dusk according to the computer clock and showing an animated sunrise/sunset)...
 
penguin all-in-one desktop assistant featuring a calender, e-mail agent, reminders, spoken jokes/trivia/greetings, i.e. "Merry Christmas!" on Dec. 25, spoken and animated tips on Linux, help with Linux, narrated commands, i.e. "Doc 4 has been saved", a full narrator for blind users, a speak module for the user to speak to the computer, and options including voice/pitch/speed/silent mode/invisible mode adjustments.
 
A translucent hand-clock on the desktop, taskbars for each desktop (auto-hideable), quicklaunch panels, and each corner of the monitor screen labeled decoratively with "1, 2, 3 and 4" for 1-click access to the 4 desktops with a cool flipping animation...
 
phew... a lot of features... but i know nothing of how to make all this a reality... anyone can help?!
 
-- Ji Zhuang
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