Peter, thank you for your review. Yimin, thanks for addressing Peter’s comments. I entered a No Objection ballot. Alissa > On Jun 25, 2019, at 8:48 AM, Yimin Shen <yshen=40juniper.net@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote: > > Hi Peter, > > Thanks very much for your detailed review for this draft! We will fix these issues in the next version. > > Thanks, > > -- Yimin Shen > > On 6/21/19, 12:50 AM, "Peter Yee via Datatracker" <noreply@xxxxxxxx> wrote: > > Reviewer: Peter Yee > Review result: Ready with Nits > > I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area > Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed > by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just > like any other last call comments. > > For more information, please see the FAQ at > > <https://urldefense.proofpoint.com/v2/url?u=https-3A__trac.ietf.org_trac_gen_wiki_GenArtfaq&d=DwICaQ&c=HAkYuh63rsuhr6Scbfh0UjBXeMK-ndb3voDTXcWzoCI&r=2-nT7xvtgxYac4wpYxwo_jh5rZM2uwTLxgRhaObwYug&m=61TkOv7C_RPT7dnqd0XVzhHp5Z3upqOSAqO5uQS1Pd8&s=L5X3khIidqv94LrBgsAHkZ66kkCliEdYqP0bbir_w-w&e= >. > > Document: draft-ietf-mpls-egress-protection-framework-05 > Reviewer: Peter Yee > Review Date: 2019-06-20 > IETF LC End Date: 2019-06-17 > IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat > > Summary: Ready with Nits. I didn't really find any substantial issues with the > document, although I admit this one is quite out of my area of expertise. I'm > reduced to making sure it sounds logical (it does) and trying to reduce the > (future) burden on the RFC Editor. > > Major issues: > > Minor issues: > > Nits/editorial comments: > > General: > > For each occurrence of "e.g." and "i.e.", make sure that it is followed by a > comma and a single space. There are some occurrences of double spaces and > pretty much no commas. > > Change "aka." to "aka" or to "a.k.a." > > Specific: > > Page 1, Abstract, 3rd sentence: change "context based" to "context-based". > > Page 3, section 1, 2nd paragraph, 1st sentence: change "repair based" to > "repair-based". Insert "and" before "[RFC7812]" or put the sequence of > references inside of parentheses. > > Page 3, section 1, 2nd paragraph, 2nd sentence: delete the comma and "i.e." > after "PLR". Put "point of local repair" in brackets. Delete the comma and > "i.e." after "MP" and place "merge point" inside brackets. > > Page 7, section 4, 1st bullet item: append a comma after the first occurrence > of "MP2P". > > Page 7, section 4, 4th bullet item, 2nd sentence: insert "on a" before > "per-service-destination". > > Page 9, 1st bullet item: change "Or" to "or". > > Page 10, 1st partial paragraph, last sentence: change "It" to "it". > > Page 10, section 5.4, 2nd paragraph, 3rd sentence: delete extraneous space > between "{E, P1}" and the following comma. > > Page 11, section 5.7 title: change "context based" to "context-based". > > Page 14, item 3, 4th sentence: change "any-cast" to "anycast". > > Page 14, item 3, last sentence: I can't parse the end of that sentence. Do you > want one or the other of "to" and "in", or is there a word or words missing in > there? > > Page 15, 1st paragraph, 1st sentence: append "of" after "AS'". And I'll just > say that that's a very labored construction to avoid using "ASs" or "AS's" in > the sentence. It took be a while to parse what was meant. > > Page 16, 1st full paragraph, 1st sentence: insert "the" before "PLR". > > Page 18, 1st paragraph, last sentence: change the first occurrence of "in" to > "if". > > Page 19, 1st partial paragraph, 1st full sentence: change "Figure-3" to "Figure > 3" to match the figure's actual labeling. > > Page 21, section 8, 1st sentence: append a comma after "far". > > Page 25, section 11, 2nd paragraph, 2nd sentence: insert "of" before "trust". > > > > > _______________________________________________ > Gen-art mailing list > Gen-art@xxxxxxxx > https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art
