Hi Lucas,
We've taken your remarks into account: removed the superfluos document overview, added
some clarifying text on
the use of the ACMEDelegationMethod object and clarified the CP and CA terms.
Thank you,
Regards,
Frederic
Orange Restricted De : Lucas Pardue via Datatracker <noreply@xxxxxxxx>
Envoyé : mardi 24 octobre 2023 23:45 À : gen-art@xxxxxxxx <gen-art@xxxxxxxx> Cc : cdni@xxxxxxxx <cdni@xxxxxxxx>; draft-ietf-cdni-delegation-acme.all@xxxxxxxx <draft-ietf-cdni-delegation-acme.all@xxxxxxxx>; last-call@xxxxxxxx <last-call@xxxxxxxx> Objet : Genart last call review of draft-ietf-cdni-delegation-acme-03 Reviewer: Lucas Pardue
Review result: Ready I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just like any other last call comments. For more information, please see the FAQ at <https://eur03.safelinks.protection.outlook.com/?url="">>. Document: draft-ietf-cdni-delegation-acme-?? Reviewer: Lucas Pardue Review Date: 2023-10-24 IETF LC End Date: 2023-10-18 IESG Telechat date: 2023-10-26 Summary: This draft is ready for publication as a Standard Track RFC. It defines a new object for CDNI to aid delegation of credentials. The draft is succint and clear. Major issues: None Minor issues: None Nits/editorial comments: Section 1 A document overview for such a short document seems a little superfluos, especially since section 1.1, 4 and 5 are standard section types. Section 2 It appears that you provide an example of the new ACMEDelegationMethod object without acknowledging so in the prose. For someone unfamiliar with CDNI, its not clear what is already defined and what is new. Perhaps consider mentioning the ACMEDelegationMethod object, with a forward reference to the object definition. Section 3 Figure 1 - the use of SVG is a welcome touch. However, it uses the terms "CP" and "CA" and those aren't spelled out. I understand these might be imported terms but the document helpfully spells out dCDN and uCDN; it would be nice to do it for CP and CA too _________________ |
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