Reviewer: Christer Holmberg Review result: Ready with Nits I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just like any other last call comments. For more information, please see the FAQ at <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>. Document: draft-ietf-homenet-front-end-naming-delegation-18 Reviewer: Christer Holmberg Review Date: 2022-10-04 IETF LC End Date: 2022-10-04 IESG Telechat date: 2022-10-20 Summary: Since the topic is outside the area of my expertise, I have no technical comments. I do think the document is a little difficult to read. Below I have a couple of editorial comments, and I think addressing those could improve the readability of the document. Major issues: N/A Minor issues: N/A Nits/editorial comments: Q1: In my opinion the Introduction section is too long, and goes into too many details. There are also things which I don't think belong to the Introduction. For example, I don't think the text in Section 1.1 belongs to the Introduction, and is not needed in order to get an overview of the mechanism. I think it belongs to a separate section (perhaps an Appendix). The same applies to Section 1.3. Similarly, Section 1.2 seems to talk about alternative solutions, before the solution in the draft has been clearly explained. I think it should be a separate section, later in the document. Q2: It is quite difficult to get a picture of how the mechanism work. There are no examples, or step-by-step functionality/use-case descriptions. Also, Section 3.1 seems to be a mixture of architecture and functionality, which is a little confusing. -- last-call mailing list last-call@xxxxxxxx https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/last-call
