Jouni, thanks for your review. Balázs, thanks for your response. Unfortunately I ran out of time to review and ballot on this document. Alissa > On Oct 2, 2020, at 10:54 AM, Balázs Varga A <balazs.a.varga=40ericsson.com@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote: > > Hi Jouni, > Many thanks for your review. > I will correct the editorial comments. > Thanks and cheers > Bala'zs > > -----Original Message----- > From: Jouni Korhonen via Datatracker <noreply@xxxxxxxx> > Sent: Friday, September 11, 2020 9:40 PM > To: gen-art@xxxxxxxx > Cc: draft-ietf-detnet-flow-information-model.all@xxxxxxxx; last-call@xxxxxxxx; detnet@xxxxxxxx > Subject: Genart last call review of draft-ietf-detnet-flow-information-model-10 > > Reviewer: Jouni Korhonen > Review result: Ready with Nits > > I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed by the IESG for the IETF Chair. Please treat these comments just like any other last call comments. > > For more information, please see the FAQ at > > <https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>. > > Document: draft-ietf-detnet-flow-information-model-?? > Reviewer: Jouni Korhonen > Review Date: 2020-09-11 > IETF LC End Date: 2020-09-11 > IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat > > Summary: > This informational document is ready for publication with some editorial nits. > > Major issues: > None. > > Minor issues: > None. > > Nits/editorial comments: > > 1) Line 210: remove the excess full stop after "Section 6" > 2) Section 1.1 lines 221 to 226. I do not see a reason to the intro text here.. > It will read odd after a while when things move on. I recommend leaving only the following text with some rewording: > "Therefore, the DetNet flow and service > information models described in this document are based on > [IEEE8021Qcc], which is an amendment to [IEEE8021Q]. > This document specifies flow and service information models only." > 3) Line 853: YANG is referred without a reference. In general, the YANG model gets mentioned for the first time in the summary as "These models are used as input for the YANG model". That came a bit out of sudden here and a some more context would be nice to have. > > > _______________________________________________ > Gen-art mailing list > Gen-art@xxxxxxxx > https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/gen-art -- last-call mailing list last-call@xxxxxxxx https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/last-call
