Please qualify your false statement I would appreciate - what was A-net all about.
The confusion that the ARPAnet supposedly had a military function stems from the research done by Paul Baran at the RAND Corporation in the early to mid 1960s. He proposed high-availability packet switched network for military command and control. The ARPAnet however was about logging in on remote computers so that researchers could more easily work together.
As for making nuclear-proof standards: the IETF is all about running code. How do you propose we test these protocols?