Thanks Sally,
As arjuna said, we appreciate your review and Vincent's review.
All you comments were useful. Here are our proposed updates to the draft
text.
Gorry & Arjuna
Sally Floyd wrote:
Gorry and Arjuna -
This looks fine to me.
One sentence needs to be corrected:
Section 2.4 says the following:
"Reception of a Quick-Start Response packet results in the sender
entering the Quick-Start Mode."
I think this needs to be rephrased. Later text gives conditions
when the reception of a Quick-Start Response packet doesn't result
in the sender entering the Quick-Start Mode. E.g., when "the
approved Quick-Start rate is less than current sending rate".
I suggest:
Reception of a Quick-Start Response packet that approves a rate higher
than the current rate results in the sender entering the Quick-Start Mode.
The rest of my feedback below is all nits and typos and such.
- Sally
http://www.icir.org/floyd/
NIts and typos:
Introduction, next to last paragraph:
"Rate-based protocols (e.g. TFRC [RFC5348], CCID-3
[RFC4342]) have a different feedback mechanism compared to TCP,
where feedback may be sent less frequently (e.g. once per RTT)."
->
"Rate-based protocols (e.g. TFRC [RFC5348], CCID-3
[RFC4342]) have a different feedback mechanism than that of TCP.
With rate-based protocols,
feedback may be sent less frequently (e.g. once per RTT)."
Done.
Introduction:
"implement different mechanism" -> "implement a different mechanism"
Done.
Section 2.3:
Could you swap the last two paragraphs?
Yes, Updated text.
Secton 2.3, next to last paragraph:
"Request, therefore" -> "Request therefore"
Done.
Section 2.5, first paragraph:
"period, during" -> "period during"
Done.
Section 2.5, second paragraph:
"when sender" -> "when the sender"
Done.
Section 2.5, Figure 2:
It might be more clear to have this for Quick-Start Mode:
+----------------------------------------------+
| Quick-Start Packets --> |
| <-- Feedback A from Receiver |
| (first feedback of a QS Packet) |
| Quick-Start Packets --> |
| <-- Feedback B from Receiver |
| (feedback of all QS Packets) |
| Receipt of Feedback A
+----------------------------------------------+
I changed it to this:
DCCP Sender DCCP Receiver
Quick-Start +----------------------------------------------+
Request/Response | Quick-Start Request --> |
| <-- Quick-Start Response |
| Quick-Start Approve --> |
+----------------------------------------------+
+----------------------------------------------+
Quick-Start | Quick-Start Packets --> |
Mode | Quick-Start Packets --> |
| <-- Feedback A from Receiver|
| (acknowledging first QS Packet)|
+----------------------------------------------+
+----------------------------------------------
Quick-Start | Packets --> |
Validation Phase | <-- Feedback B from Receiver|
| (acknowledging all QS Packets)|
+----------------------------------------------
+----------------------------------------------+
DCCP | Packets --> |
Congestion | <-- Feedback C from Receiver|
Control | |
Figure 2. The Quick-Start Mode and Validation Phase.
And then the Quick-Start Validation Phase could end with
"Receipt of Feedback B".
Added this.
Section 2.5, last paragraph:
"congestion, stops" -> "congestion stops"
Done.
Section 2.7, next to last paragraph:
"effects multiple connections" -> "affects multiple connections"
Done.
The sections go 2.8, then 2.8, then 2.10.
Fixed, but Vincents comments will update section numbering too.
Section 2.10, last paragraph:
"connnection, and" -> "connnection and"
Done.
Section 3.2:
"CCID-3, leads" -> "CCID-3 leads"
Done.
Section 3.2.4, third paragraph:
"congestion, stops" -> "congestion stops"
Done.
Section 3.3.1:
"packet per second" -> "packets per second"
Done.
Section 4.2, second paragraph:
"link or network-layer paths" -> "links or network-layer paths"
Done.
