Re: Installation Guide v 0.2

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Some additional corrections or re-interpretations below, with a nod to
correct style:

On Tue, 2004-10-26 at 16:25, Rahul Sundaram wrote:

> " Fedora Core does not support installation with
> diskettes."
> 
> I suppose you mean floppy disks here. Make sure the
> language is more explicit throughout the guide

Also, it would be better to say "from diskettes."

> "Insert CD 1 into the CD or DVD drive."
> 
> The user has an option to download and use the DVD so
> it should be something like "Insert the first CD/DVD
> into the CD/DVD drive"

No slashes please -- try: "Insert the first disc into the CD or DVD
drive." (Notice that "disc" is generic.)

> "You can also launch the system administration tools
> included in Fedora Core from any user account using
> the root password."
> 
> This would be a more precise version. "It is
> recommended that you use user system as a normal(non
> root)user. Any system administration tools in the
> graphical user interface would prompt for a root
> password if its required"

But please avoid passive voice. Try:

"You should use your &FC; system as a normal, non-root user. System
administration tools which require administrator access will prompt you
for the password for the root account."

(Note that this works outside the GUI as well, e.g. printconf.)

> "If you have to reconfigure the sound card later, you
> can use the system-config-soundcard utility. This is
> the menu item System Settings->Soundcard Detection."

"If you have to reconfigure the sound card later, use the
system-config-soundcard utility. From the GUI menu, choose System
Settings, Soundcard Detection."

> make sure you mention the menu item first and follow
> it by command line equivalents wherever appropriate.
> we should be targetting end users who are comfortable
> using the GUI better

I think the above statement takes care of everyone. Non-CLI friendly
users will ignore the program name and follow the GUI steps. Saving the
program name until second will probably often result in tortured syntax.

Just an editorial $0.02...

-- 
Paul W. Frields, RHCE


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