Hello Sarah: Many thanks for your review : ) > -----Original Message----- > From: Sarah Banks via Datatracker <noreply@xxxxxxxx> > Sent: vendredi 31 janvier 2020 17:40 > To: ops-dir@xxxxxxxx > Cc: draft-ietf-6lo-minimal-fragment.all@xxxxxxxx; last-call@xxxxxxxx; > 6lo@xxxxxxxx > Subject: Opsdir last call review of draft-ietf-6lo-minimal-fragment-09 > > Reviewer: Sarah Banks > Review result: Ready > > Hi, > Thanks for a well written, technical draft. I have no comments that stop > publication, however, I do have a couple of editorial comments to make, > focused mostly at the top of the document. Also, thanks for a doc clean of > nits, much appreciated! > > - While I find the language overall to be very approachable, in the 1. > Introduction section, you wrote "till" - please consider replacing with "until". - Done > Also in the Introduction section, you wrote "performances may fall behind..." - > it wasn't clear which multiples of performances you were referring to - be > specific, or consider revising "performances" to "performance". - I found the Changed "performances" to "latency", so we end up with "may be misused to the point that the end-to-end latency falls behind that of per-hop recomposition" > draft assumes serious familiarity of the reader on the subject. For example, in > Section 2.2, first para, "Past experience with fragmentation" - I found myself > wondering "whose past experience"? You might consider tightening up the > language here to be clear. Suggest to change the paragraph as below: " Past experience with fragmentation, e.g., as described in "IPv4 Reassembly Errors at High Data Rates" [RFC4963] and references therein, has shown that mis-associated or lost fragments can lead to poor network behavior and, occasionally, trouble at application layer. That experience led to the definition of "Path MTU discovery" [RFC8201] (PMTUD) protocol that limits fragmentation over the Internet. " I'll also add that including a decent list of follow up > docs was greatly appreciated, thanks! That will be helpful to a broader > audience. Cool : ) Many thanks again, Sarah. I posted v10 to reflect this discussion. Please let me know if all the above fits your expectations. All the best, Pascal -- last-call mailing list last-call@xxxxxxxx https://www.ietf.org/mailman/listinfo/last-call
