50 year old male with no sound coming out of his speakers

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Gentlemen, I cranked everything up but still not an ounce of sound.
My ALSA information is located at http://www.alsa-project.org/db/?f=823f89190858a6673ec0075c004db6de86c7495b
Yes I connected headphones to the green jack and ran speaker-test(1).
Doing the same on a different computer one hears static, but on this
computer -- silence.

You know what would be really neat, if there was something in /proc that
could show that yes, there really is something plugged into that 3.5mm
jack socket, as there is a change in resistance ohms, showing that the
what looks like it is soldered to the board really is.

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